Rus Eng

Good luck with your projects;)

Good luck with your projects;)

My husband worked for an international German company for 8 years. A year ago, the contract ended and our family returned to Berlin. Since no new contract was signed, the German government gave unemployment benefits for a specialist for one year. All this year, his job has become a job search. Interviews, writing projects, applying for grants, collaborations. There were small orders, but there was no permanent paid work. In Berlin, a strict quarantine was introduced and everything except pharmacies and grocery stores was closed. Our children were constantly at home and it turned out that it was almost impossible to combine artistic practice, job search and 24/7 parenting in a tiny area of ​​our Berlin housing. During this time, my husband and I received about 100 rejections. These were polite letters, letters of apology, indifferent letters, letters with wishes of love and happiness, parting words, wishes not to despair and try again. We did not despair. And we tried again.

At first we were optimistic and considered these problems to be temporary. But then the fear began to build up. What will happen to us when the benefit ends? What if we find ourselves on the street?

 This project is a visualization of this fear. Fear of failure, responsibility, fear for the future. I pull it out to make it visible. It seems to me that there are many like me, but not everyone can say about it.
Gradually, we came to the realization that our problem is not temporary. We had to come to terms with the status of a precary and admit that from now on we will have to live in a state of instability and these letters with wishes of happiness and love have firmly entered our lives. These letters became a new sign of the times, a “new reality” and a “new normalcy”.

I did this project instead of with my children, thinking about what the future holds for them.

In the project, I used quotes from real refusal letters and children's drawings.